Am I Paranoid?

Paul and I were to go to Mexico in 12 days and we were really excited!! But I've had this paranoid feeling about the trip. I'm nervous about being 9 weeks pregnant, going to a foreign country where the water and the fruit are questionable. I'm nervous that if something were to happen, we don't speak the language (beyond, "Una mas cerveza, por favor"), I would be an hour from the hospital and we wouldn't have a clue what was going on.

So, I picked a new location.

We're going to HAWAII!!!! Believe it or not, I was able to rebook our trip to a new location with minimal penalties and we're going to Hawaii instead. We'll spend 5 nights in Kauai and 2 nights in Waikiki. I'm VERY excited!!

Hopefully the paranoia is for naught but better to be safe than sorry.

I wanted symptoms....

I was telling Paul the other day that I didn't feel pregnant. I generally feel fine. I'm not tired, my breasts aren't sore, I'm a little tired but that's not all that unusual, and no morning sickness.

Until now. I'm not throwing up or anything but man, my stomach is unhappy. I'm quite nauseous. Yesterday I thought for sure I was going to get sick. I started on yoga type breathing (or Lamaze junior) - short, quick breaths, I forced down a piece of toast and managed to keep it all in. Repeat that exercise this morning.

I've read that you should eat often, small meals or snacks. It's hard though in those hours between 11pm and 8am. I wonder if I'll have to set the alarm for 2am to eat some peanut butter toast.

Really though, I can't complain. Some people have terrible "morning" sickness and are ill all the time. A little nausea isn't so bad after all.

My head almost popped off

Last night my book club met for our monthly book discussion. I use the term "book discussion" loosely as there usually isn't a lot of book talk but there's a lot of life talk. Last night was no exception.

Of the 6 people there, 4 people have kids, Megan is due in June and I'm not talking. Last night there was a LOT of talk about baby births. What to expect at the hospital, when should family and in-laws come, what is helpful, take everything from the hospital because you're going to be charged for it anyway and so on. I was definitely paying attention to everything everyone said and I wanted to ask a ton of questions but instead, I just sat there. I thought I was going to explode!

My book club friends are the perfect people to have this conversation with. They've been there, done that or are going through it now. I know that doesn't mean that we can't have the same conversations later but I really wanted to participate now!

We meet next on April 30th and by then our trip to Mexico will be complete (another stresser), I will have had my first doctors appointment and my mom will know. (I definitely can't be telling people before I tell my mom!) By then, I can tell EVERYONE!

What does that mean?

Being pregnant is weird. My stomach either has some kind of pressure or a cramp or intense pain and I have no idea why.

Last night, I had a TERRIBLE cramp. I mean, awful. And it went on for 15 minutes or so. I have to assume it was some ligament stretching or my uterus is growing but who knows. And since I am not telling anyone, I can't ask anyone. "Hey, did this happen to you? Is it normal? Should I be concerned?"


With every little (or big) pain or stab or cramp or ache I can't help but wonder, "Is something wrong?" I'm petrified of the potential of losing the baby. I mean, I understand that if something happens then it wasn't meant to be and we're better off in the long run. But that doesn't make me any less paranoid. And there's not a thing I can do about it. Nada.

I talked to my friend Jen last night for a bit and we even talked about babies and I didn't say anything. I don't want to say something and then what if something goes wrong? I just feel like it's too early to be telling everyone yet. I can't wait to tell my mom though. I can't wait to ask her how she felt when she was pregnant. Did she have morning sickness? Did she have aches and pains? What was her pregnancy experience like? Only 10 days or so until I can tell them!

Baby Fever is Real!

I went to Babies-r-Us today at lunch to pick up some shower gifts for a friend and a cousin of Paul's. Oh my. First off, that place is abnormally large considering it sells items for such tiny people. I mean, a new born baby weighs maybe 8 or 9 pounds (hopefully a little less), how can they possibly require so much stuff!!

Regardless, I can't wait! I can't wait to be able to buy little baby socks and little baby clothes. I'm a tad overwhelmed by the prospects of registering and trying to choose between 1 of 800 car seats. But that's what friends are for, right? I'll be looking to all my friends with tiny little people of their own to help me determine what I will need and won't need. I can see how it would be easy to end up with thousands of dollars worth of items, many of which you really don't need.

I did see lots of bedding that I liked for the nursery. I don't really have preferences between having a boy or a girl but the girl stuff sure is cute!! Not that my girl will be dressed like a girly-girl while I still have control....

What an Exciting Day!

Yesterday was a great day! First, we got the official news!! That was great day item #1.
Then...

Last night we went over to Jim and Ellen's for dinner with Paul's mom, his sister Janet, and his cousins Amanda, Tricia and Becki. I've never met Becki before but she's 6 months pregnant. Well, we're sitting and hanging out when Tricia says, "I have some news!" Turns out not only is she pregnant, but she's having twins!!! And in all the screaming and excitement, Janet turns to me and says, "If you have something to say you better come clean." Well, of course I turned 60 shades of red and nodded my head and said, "Yes, we're pregnant too!" Then there was more hugging and screaming all the way around. It was great!! Of course, the entire rest of the night was all baby talk. Baby this and baby that. Poor Paul, he was overwhelmed, and probably a little bored.

We weren't planning on saying anything to family for at least a couple more weeks but things don't always work out the way you planned. And I wouldn't have said anything if Janet hadn't looked at me specifically and asked me that. I have the worst poker face!

I can't wait until April 4th so I can tell my parents too!

I'M HAVING A BABY!!!

It's OFFICIAL. I went to my GP today and they did the "real" test and it was all kinds of positive. I was practically singing and dancing in the doctor's office. I hugged the PA that I see there, she was all excited. I was even gloating with the receptionist.

WOOHOOO!!!

We're going to wait until about the 8th week before we tell family. We're in CT the weekend of April 5th so we can tell my family then. Paul's mom comes back up on April 9th so we can tell her then. I wonder if we'll make it that long...

OH MY!!!!

Holy crap!!! I took the test and it came out positive. The second pink line was pale but it was there!! I actually took 3 tests and they were all positive.

The soon-to-be proud papa isn't here tonight so he doesn't know yet. I ran to Baby's-r-Us and bought an "I love my daddy" outfit that I'll give to him when he gets home. This is freakin' crazy!!

According to the 15 websites I checked, my due date will be November 16th.

I need to go find my What to Expect book that Tiffany gave me!!

Could I be?

Well, there's no sign of my cycle at all and it was due yesterday. I took a test on Thursday and it was negative but that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not pregnant. I could be but I'm trying not to get my hopes up. It's hard not to get my hopes up. If I am pregnant, I'd be almost 5 weeks already!

Tomorrow....

I could take a test tomorrow to see if I'm pregnant. I doubt I am. I may wait another day. No sign of my cycle yet so that's a good sign.

I do feel a lot calmer about it this month than last month. Maybe that's a sign. What would be weird is that if I am pregnant, I'd be four weeks already.

It's that time again

If I'm not pregnant, I should be getting my period this week. I don't really know when I'm going to get it, maybe Friday. I don't think I'm pregnant. Just ask Paul, I'm pretty moody. I'm going to be sad and disappointed if I'm not pregnant. I want to have a baby!! I seem to notice more and more people that are pregnant or have small babies. Me too me too!!

The baby making continues

No baby yet. At least that we know of. We're officially 1/2 way through month 2 so really, we havne't been trying that long. I feel like I'm uber-conscious of everything baby. Babies here and there. We were walking through Target yesterday and I was a bit overwhelmed by all the baby items. I did see some really cute things but I don't know what you'd do with half of it.